Arguing with boyfriend

by admin on October 23, 2011

arguing with boyfriendWhen you first fell in love with your boyfriend, it may seem like he’s the perfect guy and you two are compatible in every way. However, as you spend more time together, you may discover he makes many mistakes and that he thinks differently than you. For this reason, you two may squabble a lot. While fights are perfectly normal every now and then, try not to make arguing with boyfriend hobby if you want your relationship to last forever.

Arguments and breakups

While not all fights end in a breakup, your boyfriend may consider the thought of breaking up with you either because your fights get to emotional, or you keep fighting about the tiniest things every day. However, this doesn’t mean you have to keep it all inside you when he does something you don’t like just to avoid arguing with boyfriend. The key is to argue without being argumentative, so that fights actually make your relationship stronger, instead of destroying it.

What to say and how to say it

At one point in your relationship, you may have been surprised at how you ended up arguing with boyfriend after simply asking a seemingly innocent question. In fact, even a single word, if used wrongly, can spark conflict, if it puts your boyfriend on defensive mode. When confronting your boyfriend about something, it’s not just the tone of your voice but the words you use. Instead of using “you” phrases like “you don’t call me anymore”, use “I” phrases instead, like “I feel like…” or “I think that…”. Rephrasing you words in this manner emphasize that what you say is merely an opinion and you are not imposing it as a fact. Don’t use terms that generalize behavior, like “always” and “never”. The secret to arguing with boyfriend without things turning nasty is simply thinking before speaking and never letting emotions get the better of you.

Damage Control

If arguing with boyfriend has already led to a breakup, then your chances of getting back together depends on how often you fight and about what. If you don’t fight frequently, and the fight you had was a major one, chances are your boyfriend just decided to break up with you in the heat of the moment. There is a chance that after the anger has passed, he will realize his mistake and try to reconcile. However, if he has decided to break up with you because you two fight every day, you’re in for a difficult road ahead. A mad boyfriend can be won over easily compared to a tired one. If your boyfriend is tired of your senseless fighting, it might mean he has lost hope in the relationship.

If this is the case, then before you try to make up with him, you must first ask yourself why you two keep fighting and try to find ways on how to strengthen that part of your relationship. There’s still hope; however, reconciliation must come with a guarantee that things will improve from that point on and that there will be more loving and understanding and less fight and arguing with boyfriend.

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